


Friends Who Kiss (Sometimes) - English Translation

by Pureblood_Slytherin



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Jealousy, Kissing, Male-Female Friendship, Psychological Drama, Sorry about the end, perhaps, there will be a lot of kissing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-10
Updated: 2020-01-24
Packaged: 2020-06-25 20:33:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19753324
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pureblood_Slytherin/pseuds/Pureblood_Slytherin
Summary: At least, Thrawn and Karyn are friends who do that. Sometimes.





	1. A kiss on the cheek

**Author's Note:**

  * For [coffeeberry](https://archiveofourown.org/users/coffeeberry/gifts).
  * A translation of [Friends Who Kiss (Sometimes)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19744885) by [coffeeberry](https://archiveofourown.org/users/coffeeberry/pseuds/coffeeberry). 



**A/N:** This is not my work - it belongs to “coffeeberry”. She has many wonderful stories online! You should check them out. This one I really liked, so I offered to translate it to English, so that more people can read it (without Google Translator). Enjoy!

**A kiss on the cheek**

The first one was a kiss on the cheek, a conventional form of greeting for many people. A kiss on the cheek meant 'affection' and 'friendship'. It could also be, as in this case, a joyful reaction to unexpected, good news. For example, news of a well-deserved promotion.

Thrawn wanted to be the one to inform Faro about her new rank - 'Commodore'. To be the one, who, in his capacity as her superior, would attach the new rank bar to her uniform during the official act. And, in doing so, he intended to express his respect and appreciation for her and her achievements.

When he had called the Commander into his office, he had neither told her why he wanted to see her nor why it was so urgent. Perhaps that was the reason for Faro's nervousness - she didn't expect anything good. He, on the other hand, deliberately built up the tension to make the surprise even bigger. He wanted to see the whole range of Human emotions on Karyn's face when she heard about her promotion. He was indeed quite interested in how Faro would behave in such a situation.

He observed 'shock' and 'joy', but also 'happiness' and pure 'disbelief'.

"Are you serious, Sir? Really?!" He smiled at her and she smiled back at him. And then, quite unexpectedly, Faro threw her arms around his neck.

It was a hug. A _friendly_ hug. Thrawn first raised both his hands in a helpless reflex, before, quite intentionally, embracing the woman in front of him, his subordinate. He put his hands on her back, smoothing out her uniform.

It was rather nice, he thought. The closeness of another person. Warm and soft. She smelled of soap and female perfume. He was afraid to move, to spoil the moment of happiness of the future Commodore, so he remained in this unprofessional, inappropriate position.

He knew that Humans often reacted emotionally. But so far, Faro had been one of the more composed Humans he had worked with. She was always quite controlled on the bridge.

 _But what about her free time?_ Thrawn hadn't had many opportunities to meet his second in command in private. Usually, they briefly exchanged tasks when he’d finished his shift and the commander was about to start her own, but that was about it. Thus, it was rare that they both had "free" at the same time.

Thrawn imagined that Karyn had some friends with whom she could celebrate her promotion and he intended to release her from her duties for the next couple of hours as a "reward". It was her day. She should celebrate it somehow.

And her day began now, in his arms. He could feel her heart racing - her breasts against his chest - and he heard her laughing, quietly and happily. Her arms rested on his shoulders and against his neck. They could have stood there a lot longer if Karyn hadn't suddenly turned her head and had kissed him...

on the cheek. Friendly. Apparently, they were ' _friends'_ now and when her warm lips touched his cheek, Thrawn felt as if he had promoted himself. But he didn't enjoy this uncommon, yet pleasant, condition for long, as a very confused Karyn, quickly moved away from him.

Her warmed cheeks were shining red, and her eyes were filled by the fear of reprimand.

"Excuse me, Sir!" she said quickly. "I acted... unprofessionally."

"Relax." the Chiss said. "In this situation, it is understandable."

When she touched her forehead to brush away a strand of hair, it was almost as hot as her burning cheeks. Karyn laughed nervously, embarrassed.

"I don't usually react like this," she explained. "I didn't expect it. Not at all! I mean, a promotion? After all these years! I had kind of given up on it... You see, I don't have friends in high places."

She looked at him.

"It was you who recommended me, wasn't it, Sir?" she asked.

"You earned it," he replied, "to be called _Commodore_ Faro and I will be happy to call you that."

Suddenly her feelings were mixed.

"I could get a new assignment." she shifted from one leg to another. "On a new ship."

"You will be able to handle your new tasks," Thrawn said.

"No," she laughed again, almost hysterically. "That's not what I mean, I know I can handle them. I'm just wondering if you can... manage without me."

He frowned. _What did she mean with that?_

"You're working hard, Sir." the Commander told him. "But you tend to correct all those who do not use your methods because they do not understand them... When I go... IF _I go... IF_ I go, you will have to work a little on your tone and let Commander Woldar and Captain Pellaeon work in _their_ mode, not yours."

He stared at her for a moment, processing the new data.

"I didn't try... to impose my methods on you."

"No, of course not." she quickly agreed with him. "In fact, you inspired me. I tried to be like you, tried to support you and hoped to be deserving of your praise."

"I am sorry if I did not praise you enough," he replied. "I did not see the need for it, for what Humans call... 'emotional support'. I guess I was wrong."

She shook her head. There was a smile on her face.

"No, you gave me support," she said, "just... in your own way. After all, you approved the solutions I proposed and praised my effectiveness... I remember almost all your 'excellents', 'corrects' and the way you smiled at me, or the way you stood on the bridge, watching me work. Then you stopped checking on me and started to give me more responsibilities. And with that, I knew I'd earned your trust."

He smiled uncertainly, straightened up and put his hands behind his back.

"You should not try to be like me," he said. "In fact, what I value most about you is that you are not doing things the way I would do them, but that you are showing your own initiative. You can manage your own ship, a fleet if necessary. I think you are wasting your time here, serving under my command. I will, of course, be happy to continue to work with you, but I do not want to ... I am not going to keep you here if you can achieve much more."

"That's high praise coming from your lips." Faro returned with a smile, which suddenly faded slightly.

"Or perhaps you just want to get rid of me? Because I'm getting in the way of your command style; because I have trouble controlling myself; because of this..."

She made a gesture as if she was embracing the air, while Thrawn waited patiently for her to finish her speech.

"I know it was... a violation of regulations," she said nervously. "I took liberties in doing so. I'm so sorry. It won't happen again."

He felt a little uncomfortable when she’d said that. It felt almost like... regret.

"Yes... it is... unacceptable when we are on duty, but..." he swallowed. "...it is acceptable behaviour between friends and I would like to have you... as a friend." He added quickly.

What a slip of the tongue! _I would like to have you?!_ He could easily imagine the horror on Commander Vanto's face, almost as clearly as if he were standing right next to him, overhearing his words.

"I would be honoured, Admiral." Faro said.

She hadn’t caught up on the subtext. Fortunately!

**TBC**


	2. A kiss on the hand

A/N: @coffeeberry: I liked the "snack" part. ;) 

**CHAPTER 2 – A KISS ON THE HAND**

The Grand Admiral had long since thought about how to start a private acquaintance with Commodore Faro. For example, he could invite her somewhere... to a newly opened exhibition at the Coruscant Art Gallery, for instance. But then she would probably say “no”, as studying art was undoubtedly associated with work, his work, their joint work, and his long monologues. Therefore, a visit to the museum was probably not an ideal way for Karyn to spend her free time. On the upside, she wouldn't consider it a “date”, which was reassuring at least - but still, she would think of work and regard his invitation as a business matter.

Offering her joint sparring sessions might prove more successful. And indeed, he would like to do so, if it wasn't for the fact that he was currently sparring with two heavily armored droids as part of his exercise. Simultaneously. A real adversary of blood and bone would be a welcome variation, but... Thrawn didn't want to accidentally damage his precious substitute. And he was also not sure how Faro would react to an invitation to fight him… It might come across as power play.

Perhaps he should suggest that they should fight the battle droids together? Yes, that was a better idea. On the other hand... he was doing fine with the robots and asking Faro for help during a fight could be perceived as weakness and the last thing he wanted was losing her respect.

Inviting her to observe a training session would look like showing off. But then, perhaps, he could offer her some help and become her personal trainer ... Yes, that might work.... if he could bear watching the droids attacking her.

He often threw her into deep water and set more and more difficult tasks for her, to see whether or not she could rise to the challenge, but having her face murderous droids was… a bit over the top. Besides, Karyn could come to the wrong conclusion, that, after all, her superior did not like her, seeing that he deliberately exposed her to great, and not to mention totally unnecessary, danger.

And knowing Karyn, she would probably consider his proposal a challenge and she would feel very bad if she wouldn’t pass the test. And how could she? The Grand Admiral knew that the Commodore was not as skilled as he was when it came to physical skill and fitness - and to be fair she was physically weaker by nature. She was a normal Human female without any supernormal Jedi powers, whereas he was a Chiss male in his prime, who was taking care of his physic.

Thus, any comparison between the two of them made no sense. In such a situation he was bound to win and therefore he shouldn't be any kind of standard-bearer. Moreover, he did not want to be. The Empire did not need two “Thrawns”. If anything it needed diversity. Faro had her own advantages, she was like a raw diamond, which just required some polishing and cutting to shine like no other. No, she should not become another “Thrawn”. She did not have to be like him to go far: to receive the rank of “Admiral”, or maybe even “Grand Admiral”. But that would be sometime in the distant future. He could see that and honestly wished her well. Still...

….he liked working with her. He was happy with the current situation: that he was her superior and she was his subordinate. It was true that this complicated their “friendship” and more or less closed the way to a "serious relationship", but this accidental arrangement had brought them together. And they worked well together. Actually, at the moment, she was the only one he could trust.

And then it had happened: Faro had lowered her guard and he had offered her “friendship”. It was not exactly what he wanted, yet it allowed him to appreciate her company. He remembered the awkward situation well in which they both had found themselves in: his second in command had hugged him and had spontaneously kissed him on the cheek. There had been two choices at the time, either punishing her for a protocol breach and with that burying his chances with her, or offering her his… friendship.

And this “friendship” was now gradually developing. Here, on board the Chimaera, somewhere between their official duties. In fact, this “friendship” could hardly be distinguished from their previous, purely professional relationship. They both just couldn't help but talk about work. And to make matters worse, the use of titles had become second nature to them, so that a sudden switch to the first name basis seemed bizarre, if not inappropriate to them - even when they found themselves in situations that were clearly "off duty”, like drinking Coruscant red wine in his private quarters. Yes, even then they still addressed each other with the utmost respect, calling each other “Admiral” and “Commodore”.

After a few glasses, Thrawn actually started to like the sound of his official rank. Grand Admiral. Although... he quietly hoped that Faro would finally slip and call him "Thrawn". So far it hadn’t happened. Too bad, he really looked forward to seeing the blush of embarrassment on her face.

Perhaps this unintended impasse in their relationship resulted from the fact that none of them believed that they should be the one to initiate the next step. Thrawn didn't want Karyn to think he was patronizing her because he was her CO and somewhere, in his head, there was also the conviction that it should be her, the woman, who should grand him the right to call her by her given name. On the other hand, the Grand Admiral understood very well why the Commodore didn’t do it. It was his rank, which, significantly, exceeded hers. He was, after all, her superior.

Thus, perhaps they could tear down this artificial wall that divided them if they found themselves in a strictly private situation, in a place that was clearly not connected to their work. At an opera, for example. Or a museum or a modern art gallery. However, these places could also be linked to their work. For example, he could discover a link between the exhibited works and some Rebels, whom they were bound to face in battle.

Everything was connected with work, and in order to not think about it, Thrawn focused on the preset. which left him with drinking or training. And they’d already tried drinking.

***

Had the offer of a joint sparring session been inappropriate, indecent even? Two adults of the opposite sex sweating in an enclosed room? Well, with droids programmed to attack anyone within their sensor range… Two people, partners, who had to trust each other...so that none of them would accidentally get hurt. A moment of inattention from either of them … and he might actually bitterly regret this. He could turn them off with a simple command at any time, he knew that, but still he was worried… an unprecise target blow or an inaccurate laser shot… Accidents happened. There was always a risk.

Endangering his own life excited him in some way, but putting his subordinate, his “friend”, in danger was a totally different thing.

As it turned out, it might have been easier to simply ask Faro out on a date than to suggest training sessions in which she could get hurt. And again: How could he even begin to explain the motivation behind this somewhat outlandish request? All he wanted was to spend some of his free time with her and with this, he had found an activity that, at least in his opinion, friends of the opposite sex could do together, while trusting and respecting each other. And it was an activity that did not fit into the framework of their work. But when Thrawn finally dared to suggest training sessions to his second in command, she took it ….. as advice to work on her fitness.

“I practice regularly, Sir. Hand-to-hand combat as well as shooting at the shooting range.” She told him. “However, if my form does not meet your high standards, I will change my schedule to include additional training sessions as you see fit.”

With that, she tried to tell him that she trained enough and that her body could simply not live up to “Chiss standards” which, in her opinion, Thrawn was trying to impose on her. He tried to erase the mistake by explaining that he meant private, joint sessions.

Karyn's hazel eyes became round like two orbital battle stations.

“Sir, I don't know if I can handle that,” she said, a little confused. “I’ve heard about your training sessions …”

He gave her an encouraging smile. “Combat technology changes depending on the prevailing conditions. I think we could both learn something about each other... from each other, I mean.”

A slip of the tongue. Again. But, fortunately, it hadn’t been a dangerous mistake. Faro might have thought that Thrawn wanted to study her during their joint sessions in order to evaluate her technique and skills, or possibly to improve her technique and recommend some specific exercises. Naturally, Karyn considered the training he had planned as a test, but not as one that could be passed or failed - she sensed that Thrawn wanted to teach her and personalize her training.

Later on, the Grand Admiral would offer her “friendly” sparring, instead of playing the role of a mentor. Again. Teacher and pupil - again hierarchy. But in the before mentioned scenario, it was completely obsolete.

***

During their first training session, Thrawn first of all made sure that Faro was wearing a pair of gloves. He too was wearing them because sometimes there were blows which had to be blocked by hand - of course, fighting a droid wouldn't do it much harm; still, it was fun, even more so if you knew that the very same moves would do considerable damage to a blood and bone opponent. And since no warrior should be helpless without a weapon, Thrawn also trained his hand-to-hand combat skills, while ever so often letting the attacker’s body mass work in his advantage, which now he was trying to teach Commodore Faro.

He had to admit that she was good at dodging; while realizing that kicks and punches with her fists had little effect against the robots. Instinctively she looked for a weapon, any weapons. During a real battle, such behavior was sensible and natural, whereas here it was a mistake to rely too much on an acquired weapon. For example, a simple blaster: it was completely useless against this kind of droids. A rifle, however, which was part of the standard equipment of every assault trooper, was a much better choice, but it also had to be skillfully used during such a battle. Shots fired at the robot's armor, even if aimed from a promising, short distance, more often than not were a waste of time, as they couldn't inflict serious damage and only redirected the droids' focus and distract them from an attacker, so the before mentioned still had to launch his or her own, physical attack.

“Perfect timing," Karyn praised later, after he had knocked out one of the droids. She had been terrified when one of them had walked towards her, clearly with deadly intentions, and she hadn’t been able to take him out with her, admittedly, precise shots.

Thrawn showed her the weak points of the machine.

“Here and here.”

“Yes, I see.” she said ironically, which, in an official situation, she would not have done in presence of a superior, which in Thrawn’s mind could be counted as a success.

“But it's hard to hit those places when the droids are moving, unless... they're really close.”

“Such a strategy could be fruitful," Thrawn agreed. “However, you are rightly afraid of such a radical narrowing of distance between yourself and such a dangerous opponent.”

“Yeah... if the shot doesn’t neutralize the droid, I’m dead.”

“Not necessarily. You're faster than these robots, and that gives you a big advantage over them.”

“Yeah, I'm alright. As long as I run away from them.”

He smiled at her words.

“In this case an evasive action," he said, "must always be combined with a counter-attack, as increasing the distance could also work in your disadvantage. Remember these robots can also fire from a considerable distance... which they don't do as long as their enemy is just a few meters away. Then they just try to crush you.”

Faro responded with a sour smile.

“I don't know if being crushed is a better option,” she said.

“No, it's not. But in favorable conditions…” he audibly stamped a foot to the floor so that she looked to the ground “…you can avoid that, as long as there is nothing to stop your movements. A very similar type of robot was used by the separatists and was extremely effective against the clones, but it was an easy target for the Jedi.”

“The Jedi had better reflexes than I do”, she noted, “and lightsabers.”

“That is correct. And their lightsabers could easily pierce through their thick armor” he pointed to one of the droids “but it too required precision.”

He looked at Karyn.

“Raising the sword happens at the end of a battle," he said, "but before that, you have to defeat your opponent.”

She sighed.

“I don't envy the Jedi for such a fight," she said.

“You do not?”

He went closer to an inactive robot.

“It is enough to understand how these droids work to be victorious.”

He turned around and eyed Karyn again.

“They are predictable. They can be switched off or reprogrammed. They are not as challenging as living, intelligent beings. Fighting robots is actually fighting yourself.”

“So,” Faro started taking off her gloves, suggesting that she had had enough of studying for the day. “I guess I’m not doing too well in this fight.”

Then he saw the redness on her body, which undoubtedly would turn into bruises soon. In addition, a slight swelling appeared on her left wrist. That wasn’t good.

Faro felt his gaze upon her and reflexively touched the bruise on her hand.

“It is not broken," she said in a carefree tone and to prove her claim, she raised her hand and waved to him.

And then she winced a little.

“Can I have a look at that?” He asked, concern in his voice.

She hesitated, which Thrawn interpreted as consent. He took off his gloves and then carefully reached for her hand. Karyn took an audible breath of air.

His Chiss eyes allowed him to see in the infrared, which his subordinate knew very well. He noticed a developing inflammation in her hand and although he could not X-rays it with his eyes, he was still able to evaluate the condition of her bones and tendons. The damage was minimal. A cold compress, a little bacta and in a few hours the Commodore could return to work.

When he looked so closely at her small hand in his, he sensed a change in Karyn's body temperature: yes, it rose by one or two degrees. Thrawn felt her warm skin under his fingers and then... brought her hand to his lips and slightly blew on it. He overcame the desire to look at her face, which, no doubt, was covered in wonder. Yes, it was an unnecessary, totally irrational gesture, just like the kiss he placed upon her exposed skin a moment later. Only then did he let go of her weak hand.

He straightened out, trying to hide a sudden rush of embarrassment. Luckily, Faro wasn't that good at face reading.

“It is… a rather common custom among my people.” he made up quickly. “A token of respect for the wounded.”

Karyn didn't say anything for a second, and then, totally unexpected, told him:

“Among my people, we have a similar custom. We sometimes kiss the bruises of our children.”

That made him feel uncomfortable.

“It is an expression of concern," she explained, smiling innocently. “I appreciate the gesture.”

Was that so? The thought of kissing the remaining bruises on her body made him hot: A lot hotter than after the earlier fight with the droids. Well, whereas he didn't hide the fact that he cared about Karyn, going on kissing her injuries… might not be a good idea. Small steps. That was usually the best way into a woman’s heart.

**TBC**


	3. A kiss on the forehead

**A kiss on the forehead**

Sometimes a kiss could accompany a goodbye. Thrawn had arranged the briefing in such a way that he had a moment to talk to Faro in private, on the pretext of giving her some instructions in case of a rebel attack. Instructions she did not need because even in his absence, the Commodore could very well handle such a situation on her own. No, Thrawn wasn’t worried at all that he might return from Coruscant to find nothing but ash and ruin above and on Lothal. No, the anxiety he felt was caused by a different reason entirely.

He wanted to kiss Commodore Faro. Years of observation suggested that Humans did this - they kissed "goodbye". Usually, the man stood in front of the woman, leaned down and kissed her... on the cheek, or on the mouth.

Unfortunately, however, the Grand Admiral couldn't just aim for her lips. What kind of impression would that make? She might just slap him then, right then and there, or she might not like it, which, in his opinion, was a lot worse than a reflexive slap, in self-defence so to speak. Thrawn knew what refusal was, he had come across it more than once, and it had always been hard to accept.

Since the Grand Admiral always considered all possible events, one of them, of course, was the worst-case scenario: Faro respected him, maybe even liked him, but she felt nothing more towards him, neither romantic, nor sexual. If that was the case, kissing her might very well ruin their “friendship” once and for all. Thus, before taking such a radical step - a passionate kiss - he had to be sure that it would be well received.

Therefore, the plan was to carefully observe her: her behaviour in his presence, especially her facial expressions and how she would react to his words and physical closeness in general. And if he then saw something that indicated that he could afford more, he would strike. However, so far, he hadn’t seen any clear signs of sexual interest on her part: either she hid her attraction very well or she did not feel anything at all. But he couldn’t just openly show Karyn that he was interested in her. He had to be very careful here. Perhaps he should find out what she liked in men and then emphasize these qualities in himself if he possessed them.

If he was lucky, Karyn was attracted to intelligent men; if she was into cheerful, funny men, things might become a little problematic. He sometimes allowed himself a sarcastic remark, but, truth to be told, he sometimes had problems to understand human jokes, and when he did, they didn't entertain him much. He couldn't make her laugh - at least not the kind of laugh that brought people closer together.

Perhaps he could find a clever way to make her tell him what her “dream man” looked like. She could tell a “friend” couldn’t she? A good one, one that offered a shoulder to cry on… But the Chiss had never actually seen her cry and he was also not sure if he could handle such a situation in a way that it served his cause. It would be perfect if Karyn would simply provide him with a list of her "exes”, then he could use ISB to track them down, analyze them and provide him with the necessary information and then he would make sure that none of the bastards would ever come close to his Commodore. Not even via holonet. He wasn’t jealous - he just wanted to protect her - from herself if necessary.

But now he stood in front of her and was uncertain about how to proceed. He could hand her the datapad with the orders and then, in the last moment, lean forward to give her a “friendly" kiss on the cheek. But he had to be careful not to accidentally miss and kiss her lips instead. Or, worse, miss on purpose, which may actually happen if she lifted her head in a certain way. Yes, he wanted to miss the target and examine her reaction afterwards.

Thrawn looked at her lips: he assumed that they were warm and soft, perhaps a little salty? Or would they still taste of whatever she had drunk before? He couldn't look for too long or she would know he wanted to kiss her. So, he looked at her left cheek instead, also soft and warm, but not as invitingly pink as her lips. In his mind he calculated the right angle to tilt his head and wondered if it wouldn’t be saver to hold her in place, to embrace her somehow, in a “friendly” way.

Both stood stiffly, though not at attention; Faro now held the datapad in her hands, well, now she could hit him with it instead… She titled her head to be able to look him in the eye. He liked that about her, unlike many others, she did not look away... Did her eyes reflect hope now? Or fear?

No, he couldn't kiss her the way he wanted to. So, instead, he leaned over and kissed her forehead. That was how the Chiss sometimes expressed their feelings for each other. Was it the same with Humans? Thrawn felt Karyn's forehead turn hot under his lips. Her hair smelled of standard navy shampoo.

Faro lowered her eyes, but she did not move back, which was a good sign. She also did not push him away, which was an even better sign. She probably looked at his neck now, or at his throat - the place just above the uniform collar. What was she thinking now?

Thrawn felt a known warmth filling him and it travelled fast, past his chest and gradually moved lower... If she would kiss him now: on the neck, on the chin, the cheek, anywhere…

He finally stopped the kiss, which lasted for a few seconds too long to be called completely innocent. He looked down at Faro from above. He really should say something, but he couldn't find the right words, and what words could express his feelings better than this simple gesture anyway? His lips now turned into a small smile, which he hoped she would return.

But the only thing he saw in her eyes was uncertainty, and then she blushed, obviously embarrassed.

“Sir?”

That one word erased all improper thoughts at once and put him right back into Grand Admiral mode. And what Grand Admiral would have done that? Assignment first, kissing second? Friendly, it may have seemed, but it had hardly been.

Faro would never talk to him about this, never question the situation or these totally irrelevant orders. But still, it was better to erase her doubts even before they would form in her head. She couldn’t ask for an explanation, so he should provide her with one.... Even if all of this made no sense?

“I do not expect problems in the near future, but…” said Thrawn with unpretentious care in his voice “… even the best strategists sometimes do not anticipate all events. May warrior’s fortune shine on both of us, and may our separation not be long.”

Faro relaxed a little; she had understood it as a friendly farewell. A beautiful smile appeared on her face when she answered him:

“Thank you, Sir. Have a safe trip and let’s hope everything goes your way.”

**TBC**


	4. A kiss on the cheek (encore)

**A kiss on the cheek (encore)**

Humans sometimes talked about "turning the other cheek" - but that, usually, was not about kissing - which was too bad, really. But when it came to kissing people on the cheek, let's say for a welcome, the problem of the “other cheek" inevitably appeared. Should you kiss the other cheek, too? And if you wanted to kiss both cheeks, should you start on the left, or on the right cheek?

In some cultures, terrible "triple-kisses" were practised, where the recipient had to be prepared for a quick kiss-assault. It was like: one, two, three, go! And more often than not, one wasn’t sure whether or not the second kiss would be followed by a third one. Three kisses were customary, yes, but not everyone was following this custom… so, perhaps, it would be better to simply stick to the more common, symbolic two "air kisses”.

It was easy to get confused by all of this and to make mistakes: For example, one could "exit" the embrace prematurely, before the third kiss. Or one could wait in vain for a third kiss and with that create an awkward moment of silence.

Perhaps the easiest way out of this misery was to simply take advantage of the recipient’s disorientation: Hold the person gently and wait for the surprise and the usual freezing of the person to set in, and then attack: One, two, three and then quickly take a step back, smile and smoothly move from a greeting phrase to the next, more official part, of the meeting.

Thrawn knew all this, still.....the idea of "kissing the air" was completely alien to him. Not that he should be surprised, as Humans loved to make every interaction as difficult as possible. And therefore, they were just as ambiguous about the number of kisses as they were about the number of Corellian hell circles. In other words, if you asked two people, you would get two totally different answers.

 _Two or three kisses?_ , Thrawn wondered and since he liked Commodore Faro very much, he went for the three kisses option.

But, as the Grand Admiral was about to find out, Karyn's home planet did not practice the three-kisses-variant, and so Faro leaned back too quickly and his lips landed a little lower than intended, on the lower part of her cheek... actually not too far from her mouth, as he later realised.

 _Wonderful._ He was confused and Karyn... decided to turn the whole thing into a joke. Or at least that's what he thought when she declared that the number of kisses should equal the number of days of absence, which, in this case, actually had been three days.

Thrawn couldn't help but imagine a compensation for a longer separation: for, let's say, a week of absence. Well, all was fair, as long as it brought him closer to her tempting lips. Three kisses already looked like a kiss session! Still... he wanted more.

"I have the impression that this was not a successful welcome," he said.

"No. Why would you say that?" Faro said, obviously surprised.

"Those kisses were far from perfect," he replied. "It is rather confusing. Please, teach me how to do this right.".

He risked a lot by simply asking her for help, but it was also a logical move, because, as a "friend”, he could afford to do so.

And it also wasn't the strangest thing he had ever asked her.

Faro was already accustomed to the fact that her Chiss commander sometimes had his “problems” with Human customs. Sometimes he just did not understand them and then it was up to her, his right hand, to provide the appropriate explanations. She also accepted, at least to a certain extent, that his methods and behaviour were sometimes different, as they resulted from a different upbringing and culture.

***

Before they had become "friends", some of these situations had probably been a lot more embarrassing for the Commander. For example, when the Grand Admiral had asked her to help him to master the Imperial Waltz. That was actually when all of this madness had started...

Back then, he had needed a female partner to practice with, and Karyn had simply been within reach. And at that time, he also hadn't realized how inappropriate his request had been.... _dancing with a colleague_.... He hadn't known that _dancing_ included physical proximity, holding her in his arms and keeping her small hand in his. And certainly not, that sometimes their hips would meet... He was still amazed that Humans did such things in public, at social gatherings!

In the end, Faro had turned out to be a good instructor. In a few, short words she had explained what she expected of him. During those moments, it had seemed like she had forgotten that he was her superior. Actually, she had been in command then. And he had liked it. Faro was very skilled, and she knew how to make others do what she wanted. It was easy to see her as a future leader.

Learning the steps and remembering their sequence as well as their variations hadn’t been a problem, but the rhythm and... the physical closeness, had. Fortunately, Faro's professionalism had helped him to overcome these difficulties. At least that's what he had thought at the time...

Later on, however, he had realised that the end-result of their training lessons had only been so satisfactory because he had gotten used to Karyn's body language, and not because he had understood the technique.… They just “worked" together. The music had been nothing but background-noise and he had focused solely on her movements, on responding properly, and sometimes, yes, he had provoked some situations. However, it had been Faro, who at one point had asked him to try "lifting". Thrawn could not imagine to _ever_ do such a thing with a strange woman in a room full of people, but they had been alone and when Karyn had asked... he hadn't had the heart to refuse her. It had been nice, to feel the weight of her body, to lift her up a little and to see how her brown eyes filled with joy... maybe not only because the performance had been technically correct… Truth to be told, the thought had occupied in his mind for some time: that, perhaps, Karyn _liked_ him.

However, at some point, he had pushed the thought away, had waved it off as wishful thinking. Yes, apparently, _he_ had started to like her, which did not necessarily mean that she returned the feeling. Alas, the realization had turned the dance into something “more” than a simple sequence of steps…. And, because of that, naturally, the problem of the proximity to his partner, his second in command, whom he valued and trusted, had disappeared. 

Still, at the time, the thought of leaning forward and kissing her while she was in his arms, hadn't crossed his mind. And if it had, he had probably buried it somewhere at the bottom of his consciousness, together with the realisation of how desirable the Commander looked, when her hair fell out of place and when she breathed through her mouth. Yes, he remembered that moment quite vividly, he had instinctively tightened his grip on her and had led a lot more confidently, as if suddenly he had remembered that he was the commanding officer here. In a way, he had learned his lesson then, he had understood how to lead, to dance, how to make his partner feel safe in his arms.

During a dance, the body receives all kind of stimuli - and his had almost immediately understood that Karyn Faro was an ideal partner for him - but his mind... his mind had brought it down to “mastering the technique”. Looking back now, it had been naive to think that following Faro's instructions would suffice to succeed on the dance floor...

And, sure enough, during the Imperial Ball, Thrawn had found out that dancing required more than just technique. Governor Pryce had been his dancing partner then and... the problem hadn't been that Pryce danced differently, or that she was shorter than Karyn and only reached to his shoulders. No. As it had turned out, his body just didn't respond to her's the way it did to Faro's. It had protested against this strange, inappropriate, untamed female closeness - like it had recognised that the woman in his arms was not Karyn and then it had simply refused cooperation. And Pryce shouldn't be the exception.

This dance, and the two that had followed, had been enough for the Chiss to avoid the dance-floor for the rest of evening, hiding somewhere, preferably in male company, while drinking red wine. After a few glasses, the Grand Admiral started to regret not having invited Karyn to this "elite" celebration. No, more than that, he had become angry with himself. Karyn could have been his “plus one”, instead of Pryce, who had quickly vanished to make some new, profitable acquaintances. He certainly would have preferred a partner that would stand with him in a corner, while slandering about Imperial customs, to one that used the ball purely to conduct polite conversations with governors, moffs, senators and ambassadors.

Naturally, Thrawn understood why Pryce did it, but it didn't change the fact that he had felt abandoned...

He also had had a little too much to drink and suddenly he had found himself in a strange situation: he had attempted to “flirt” with the young Princess of Alderaan. On top of that, he had tried to talk about Alderanian art with her, which hadn't made much of an impression. Really.....there had been no need to tell her that he would be more than willing to buy some extremely valuable pieces from her family.

When he had finally sobered up a little, it had been obvious what had attracted him to the young Princess. Dark, brown eyes and hair in the same colour... charisma... and, although Leia Organa was an aristocrat, it was surprisingly easy to imagine her wielding orders on the Star Destroyer. But that did not change the fact that the Princess hadn’t graduated from Naval Academy - unlike Faro - and that she would never able to develop a more complicated battle strategy... And that he could never talk to her about the clone wars... or about real battles and what it meant to be a soldier.

Then, when he had looked at her again, from a safe distance and with a more critical eye, he had realised that they too wouldn't have made good dancing partners. She was tiny and had a filigree figure and even though it would have been easy to lift Leia, he had found out that he did not feel the slightest desire to do so. Probably because Leia Organa was a complete stranger to him. In the end, it hadn't really mattered as he had only spoken to her because he had been in desperate need of company, of someone who would make the Ball _bearable_ for him.

He had missed Commander Vanto, with whom he could talk, and Commander Faro, with whom he enjoyed to dance. He had even begun to wonder whether Faro would wear a dress and whether she would look like Princess Leia in such an outfit, or if she would prefer a simple dress uniform, like Governor Pryce. And like that, he had come to the conclusion that he had made a mistake by not inviting her.

Later, he had thought about the possibility that this neglect might even have offended Faro. Maybe she had expected an invitation after she had devoted her free time teaching him how to dance. 

_Would it have been the right thing to do? To invite her to the Imperial Ball? Did she even like balls?_

In his opinion, participation was a nightmare. And he truly doubted that the Commander would have enjoyed spending time with the "Coruscant elite". She would only have shared his misery.

***

Now, a few months later, the Grand Admiral was certain that he had made a mistake. Maybe something would have sparked between them if he had invited her to that ball. He wouldn't hesitate now. Because now they were "friends", which made the whole thing a lot easier. As a friend, Karyn would probably have been willing to accompany him during the Imperial celebrations. He would have offered to show her Palpatine's famous gardens, and, if she wouldn't have been interested, he would have tried to tempt her with food and drinks. And then, perhaps, she might have been willing to attend the ball with him, and - who knew - she might even have had a good time. Probably they would have talked for most of the time, while standing, or sitting or strolling through the corridors of the Imperial Palace. And they might even have danced a little too. That might have worked. Just that it hadn't happened...

He just wanted her back in his arms, not necessarily in the presence of Imperial officials, but, at this point, any given opportunity sounded just fine.

Naturally, by now, Empire Day had passed and it was a terribly long time till the Emperor's birthday, and no one important was willing to marry and grace him with an, otherwise totally unwelcome, invitation. In short: When the Grand Admiral was in desperate need of some pompous balls, none were in sight and all he could do was wait, which irritated him.

Humans said that unused opportunities came back to hunt you - and he felt almost inclined to agree. On the other hand, the Chiss said, that every defeat came with new opportunities.

In this case, three kisses instead of two. A situation that could easily ruin his friendship with Commodore Faro. Thus, Thrawn decided to defuse the situation by displaying, once more, a total lack of Human cultural competence. Usually, this strategy worked - at least with Faro.

A bit embarrassed, she stood before him now. But then she rose to her tiptoes and kissed him first on his right and then on his left cheek.

"Like that," she said.

"Do you mind?"

When she nodded, Thrawn repeated what she had done: he kissed her right, and then the left cheek, or to be more precise, the area around her cheekbones. He noticed that Faro had closed her eyes for a moment as if she was enjoying it. He also enjoyed kissing her warm cheeks and he would gladly do so again... well, if it weren't for the possibility that such an action might spoil the moment of…

….two perfect kisses on Karyn's beautiful cheeks. Thrawn smiled, happy that, this time, he had succeeded.

**TBC**


	5. A drunk kiss

**A drunk kiss**

Governor Pryce had told him once that some invitations were meant to be ignored and that getting out of some celebrations, was, contrary to what he had thought, sometimes even expected by the hosts. That it was nothing but “curtesy” to invite some people. As far as he had understood, it had something to do with politics. In his opinion, inviting people you didn't want to see was illogical, and refusing to visit someone when you didn't have a good reason for it was rude. Thus, the thought that the invitation he had received could have been a mere "courtesy invitation” did not cross his mind.

Especially so, since he and Faro were "friends” now and as such she would count him among the people with whom she wanted to celebrate this special day. Fortunately, the Grand Admiral did not have to postpone his duties in order to participate in this celebration, and if it had been otherwise, he wouldn’t have minded changing them in order to spend some time with his friend, the “birthday girl”.

However, there was one thing he did not take into account when it came to this party: his rank and that all of Karyn's guests were his subordinates. Theoretically, that shouldn't be a problem, because the Commodore was his second in command, and therefore she was also the superior of all her friends, except him, of course. But, as it turned out, some of the guests were not sure how to behave in the presence of the Grand Admiral and whether it would be appropriate to get drunk in his presence.

Faro did her best to lighten the mood a little. She reminded everyone that they were off duty and that, above all, they should have a good time. She encouraged her guests to make a toast. First, they drank for her health, then, to Thrawn’s surprise, _his_ health, and only then, for the Emperor's health. Toasts were then given to all kinds of Individuals and ships, probably just to have an excuse to drink. And that they did.

As Thrawn was about to find out, alcohol made Humans more accessible, for example Captain Pellaeon of the Harbinger, with whom had originally talked about Corellian art, suddenly gave a long monologue about his family history, including some information about his illegitimate son! But he only listened with half an ear as all he cared about was Karyn, who, at this point, tried to encourage her guests to dance.

What Chiss saw then did not resemble _anything_ he had ever seen at any of the Imperial balls. The performances of some of the Humans could be best described as “tribal dances”. They danced in pairs, in groups, or on their own and often changed partners, on a purely random basis.

A part of him wouldn’t mind studying this cultural novelty about Humanity in close up and personal, the other, more dominat part, however, told him he wasn’t nearly drunk enough to act on that impulse. And even if most of the officers present seemed to have forgotten about his presence or at least seemed to have accepted it, it would not be that easy for him to forget about his position and the role and expectations that came along with it.

Over time, most men had taken off their jackets, but not him. He had only allowed himself to open the first few buttons of his uniform, and he had only done it, after an already totally drunk Woldar had announced to everyone how hot it was, and then he had not only removed his jacket, but also the shirt underneath it! And to his surprise, nobody was too bothered about it. And nothing except some harmless jokes about the commander's "underdeveloped" chest had happened. Unbelievable. Out of the corner of his eyes, Thrawn saw Pellaeon rolling up the sleeves of his uniform and then decided to follow his example. It was rather warm.

He had barely finished rolling up his sleeves, when a laughing and glowing Faro suddenly appeared in front of him.

“Don’t you want to dance, Admiral?” she asked. “I’m sure many ladies would like to be in your arms tonight.”

For a moment, he thought he had misheard. But then Faro stretched out an arm.

“Don't make me beg.”

How could he refuse her? It was her birthday after all. He wondered if he would be able to handle these wild “dances”, but, luckily, the Commodore ordered a change of music as soon as she pulled him to the dancefloor.

“Just like a waltz,” she whispered into his ear.

Well, it was not a waltz, but the steps were similar enough.

Thrawn smiled lightly and tried to ignore the fact that the others preferred to look at them instead of joining in. Faro also sensed that her plan to mobilize the crew to participate in more traditional dances burned to the ground. It called for a change of plan and as soon as the last notes of the melody came to an end, the Commodore pushed Thrawn towards an embarrassed Commander Hammerly, and she herself grabbed Lieutenant Lomar's hand.

“Come on!!” she called out. “You know how! You had to do it at the Graduates' Ball!”

Finally, some of her guests followed her example and entered the dance floor in pairs of two. Some with more decisive steps, others a little shy.

Thrawn carefully embraced Hammerly. He was no less embarrassed about this than she was, although he hid it better than she did. He danced with her, and then, voluntarily, asked Senior Lieutenant Pyrondi for the next dance.

If Faro wanted him to dance, he would do it. After all, she was in charge of this... _battle_.

But it was not the constant spinning that made the Grand Admiral suddenly sick to his stomach. It was the sight of Faro enjoying the company of Major Carvia, the Commander of his assault troops. And with that, his enthusiasm for dancing faded and the urge to drink appeared.

Trying to get off the dance floor, the Grand Admiral passed by a somewhat frightened Lieutenant Tschel, who perhaps thought that Thrawn, heading towards him, would also want to dance with him.

“Please replace me on the dance floor, Lieutenant.” Thrawn muttered and went straight to the bar.

He studied the labels for a while before choosing a bottle, carefully tasting its content. He was still sober enough to care about the taste, while others already emptied the bottles a lot less choosy than him.

He enjoyed the drink’s color and taste, while he watched Faro and Carvia dancing together for the second time. He did not like the Major and the way he embraced Karyn’s waist and whispered something in her ear that made her first laugh and then blush.

He clenched his hand tighter around the bottle. He wouldn’t mind throwing it at Carvia. But he probably shouldn’t – he could hit Commodore Faro by accident. Only after a while, he admonished himself that throwing a bottle at anyone was bad taste and that no self-respecting officer would do such a thing. But he could demote the Major, but... on what grounds? For spending time with a beautiful woman that attracted the gazes of many men? Himself included? And he had also danced with her, just as intimately, if not more. He admitted himself such behavior, but felt the need to punish the Major for it.

It was about Faro. It was all about her. Thrawn wouldn't feel that way if Carvia would embrace Hammerly like that, but when he saw him with Karyn, with _his_ Karyn, there was an irrational anger in him. He was jealous. That’s what it was.

He'd rather spend the evening with her. Alone. With her and a bottle of good wine. Right now, he could only do the later, minus the wine and minus Karyn. And there was no way he could tell her that he was interested in her.

He emptied the bottle and went back to the dance floor, watching them.

“My wife left with one," said Pellaeon, who suddenly stood next to him.

Thrawn turned around and curiously looked at the Captain.

“She left you for some Major?” he asked.

“No, he worked for CorSec.”

“CorSec”?

“The Corellian Security Service," explained Pellaeon. “He was there, and I was not...”

“Oh, I see.”

The Grand Admiral looked at Carvia again and this time he smiled. The solution to his problem was child's play. Carvia had to go. All he had to do was send him to Lothal. Not necessarily to the front, he just had to make sure that Carvia didn't have a chance to meet Faro too often.

And right now... he could, theoretically, give the Major the order to leave, or forbid him to approach the Commodore, he could even throw him in jail, and the pure awareness of so many possibilities to get rid of his rival was a great pleasure to the Chiss. Of course, he did not intend to do any of these things. It wouldn’t be right to ruin her birthday.

After a while, he sat in a corner, drank strong alcohol, watched and waited. He knew that he could leave earlier; he even assumed that, perhaps, it was expected of him. That perhaps as soon as the door would close behind him, his officers would breathe a sigh of relief and behave more... frivolously. He would have done it if it hadn’t meant leaving Faro and Carvia behind in such a situation. So, in order to prevent misfortune - his own mainly - he stayed and found himself once again in the company of the irreplaceable Gilad Pellaeon, who, after a few glasses, willingly shared some advice on how to protect a relationship from disintegration. And some of them were actually worth remembering.

When the party finally came to an end, the Grand Admiral was drunk, but still he was a lot less drunk than most of the guests, who had drunken a lot less than him. He noticed that most of the officers went out in groups and those on the sides were supporting the ones in the middle that could barely stand on their feet. And when the march started the sober ones were setting the direction.

He saw Commodore Faro at the door and joined her.

“We're heading to the same destination.” He said.

And with that, he felt the need to crush his head against the wall. _Damn it!_ He had meant, the same floor, not the same quarters! But Karyn was too distracted to notice the subtext in his words.

“Yes... but I still have to say goodbye to the guests.” she looked at Thrawn and smiled. “I'm glad you came, sir.”

He thought that for this smile alone it was worth to have come and to stay to the very end.

“I will wait for you," he replied.

He wanted to be a gentleman, he was going to make sure that she was safe and that there was no Major waiting for her somewhere.

“Thank you, sir," Karyn said and she blushed a little. “I think, I'm a little drunk... in my present condition, I could actually get lost.”

And under no circumstances he could allow that to happen!

“I shall escort you to your quarters then."

There was gratitude on her face.

And it warmed his heart. He watched Faro hugging her friends one by one, and then... she hugged Major Carvia. Thrawn tightened his left fist behind his back. He wouldn’t mind crashing it into the Major's face. He only relaxed when he noticed Faro's worried look.

When they were finally alone, the Commodore turned to him and he offered her his arm.

“Thanks.” Karyn slipped her hand underneath it and grabbed it slightly above his elbow. Thrawn nodded his head. Then they headed towards the turbolift.

After just a few steps, he realized that the Commodore was having trouble to walk. She was really drunk and so she accepted his help without hesitation. She held on to him tightly and when they found themselves in the elevator, she immediately leaned against the wall and breathed deeply.

She looked at Thrawn and smiled. She didn't say anything, she just... smiled so beautifully. The Grand Admiral was staring at her like she was a piece of art. A famous picture, which, regretfully was not part of his private collection - yet.

When he left the elevator, a small gesture was enough and Karyn grasped for his arm. He only regretted that their walk didn't last longer.

When they stopped in front of her quarters, he looked at his companion with anticipation. He was hoping for a farewell kiss on the cheek. Faro smiled, climbed on her toes and... kissed him on the mouth.

He froze.

_What had happened?_

_A mistake? Had she missed target? She hadn’t kissed him consciously, had she?_

He looked down at her, waiting for some explanation. But all he got was:

“Goodnight, Admiral Thrawn.”

**TBC**

Notebook:

Faro, later: http://cdn-webimages.wimages.net/052fee0c11704022b95752fc2c6b0d003a4d4d-v5-wm.jpg?v=4


	6. The meaning of a kiss

**The meaning of a kiss**

It had tasted like delicious, red Coruscanti wine and just like it, it had turned his head, leaving him with a note of bitterness.

Thrawn was still standing in the hallway, trying to figure out that kiss. He stared at the closed door, hoping it would open again. That her blushed face would reappear and that Karyn would then say something, anything, that would help him to understand what had just happened.

But, apparently, she preferred to stay behind that door. Maybe she was standing on the other side of that door now, touching her red lips with her hand, remembering that kiss and... regretting what she had done? Or maybe she didn't think about it at all. Maybe she just went to her bedroom, took off her clothes and then fell on the bed?

He was tempted to knock on her door, but he thought better of it. If she hadn't been able to talk after kissing him, she probably had fallen asleep as soon as her head had met the pillow. Would she dream of him? Of kissing him? He wouldn't mind, as he himself surely would. After this, he would dream of her, her lips, her feminine curves and when he woke up, he would look for her on the other side of the bed. In vain.

***

And afterwards, on the next morning, he also looked for her on the bridge, before remembering that he himself had approved a change in her schedule due to her birthday celebrations. She had asked him two days earlier, during the planning phase. At the time he had not really linked the two events, as he himself had never suffered from the aftermaths of excessive alcohol consumption. Still, the fact that he, a Great Admiral of the Imperial Fleet, had forgotten about the rescheduling of his flagship's bridge crew should teach him a lesson: Strong alcohol and fun should neither be mixed nor exaggerated, as his thoughts weren't where they should be and such distractions could have tragic consequences for everyone on board.

Cmdr Faro's substitute was Commander Hammerly, a proud alcohol abstinent. Unfortunately, even without a hangover, Hammerly was not in good shape: fatigue was written all over her face. She had tried to hide it with hastily applied makeup. It hadn't worked. Next to her Thrawn spotted a thermal mug with hot coffee in it. She probably hadn't managed to have breakfast. Usually, he would have admonished such behaviour, but not today. He just didn't have the heart to care about it, especially since he could easily calculate for how long the Commander had had a chance to sleep, and he also knew that that wasn't nearly enough for a Human to ensure a full recovery.

So, he just sat down in his command chair and watched the crew; supervising their work. Usually, he didn't do such a thing, but it was as good an excuse as any to be on the bridge - he just wanted to talk to Karyn as soon as possible. But, unfortunately, that would have to wait. It was likely that Karyn was still asleep, and demanding her presence on the bridge, waking her up, just to ask her some personal questions, probably wasn't the best idea.

Hammerly peeked at Thrawn a little suspiciously, as if she thought why the Grand Admiral was checking up on her all of a sudden. There was a slide possibility she regretted dancing with him now; probably she even wondered if the dance (and her missteps during it) had changed his opinion of her.

Of course, those things were the last thing on his mind. Actually, he didn't want to talk about what had happened last night - to any of his officers. Ever. Except for Karyn. To her, he wanted to talk. He wanted to know what _it_ meant - he had to understand it. So, he sat in his chair and took pride in that gloomy face of his, while Commander Hammerly felt the same way she used to at Academy, during those terrible, and seemingly never-ending, practical exams.

After a while, however, Thrawn decided that it was probably better to refocus his attention on how to deal with the Rebellion and completing the holographic map of enemy movement within the sector. And once he had completed the data, he would invite Faro to his office to `help´ him analyse it. They would spend some time together, talk, and in due time, he would simply ask her about that kiss. He had to. And if he were lucky, she might even bring it up first.

The Grand Admiral already simulated several possible scenarios of this conversation in his head. All the words that might be uttered and all the actions that could be taken to achieve the desired goal: Karyn in his arms, sweet victory. He refused to imagine the alternative. Of course, it wouldn't go smoothly and there would be some clarifying and some troublesome issues to deal with. For example, her dances with Major Carvia. There was no way, she was into him, right? She had only been trying to be nice to him, without any subtext. Because, after all, she kissed him, Thrawn, and not Carvia. Or had she only done it because the thing with Carvia hadn't worked out?...

He should be pleased that Faro had kissed him, but instead, he had doubts: Had she really wanted to kiss him like that? After all, nothing even remotely like it had happened between them before. Nothing that would lead to a confession of romantic feelings that was. He hadn't even given her any special gift, only some dry wine, not unlike what most of the guests had brought along. But it had been good enough that he hoped it hadn't been drunken by some random liaison officers last night. He preferred the thought that it had survived and that the Commodore could enjoy it later, after some hard day of service. On the other hand, however, it was better off in the hands of some nameless liaison officers than being drunk by Faro and Carvia. Alone - in her private quarters. Theoretically, Thrawn shouldn't care with whom and when the Commodore wanted to drink the wine, but in practice it would make him very nervous if the Commodore and the Major were to spend some time alone. Dating.

Was Faro `friends´ with Carvia? Just like she was with him? Maybe she was unaware of how she appeared to men? How she made them feel? Thrawn, as her ´good friend´, should definitely warn her about the Major, who, by all appearances, had more than a platonic friendship in mind.

Actually, he should warn her about every man, except for himself, of course. Faro probably had no idea how much self-discipline it cost a Chiss not to act on 'friendly' kisses, on the cheek or elsewhere. But he respected his second-in-command too much for that and he was also too afraid to spoil everything with one stupid, rash action. But he had to do something now, as some men, and Carvia certainly belonged to those men, were typical hunters, and once they had entered the game, they had to win it, at all cost.

And that was, quite possibly, what the Grand Admiral feared most, even more than the possibility that Faro might have a crush on the young Major, that the Commodore only wanted to establish a ‘friendly relationship’ with Carvia, and that he would turn it into something completely different quite soon, adding her to his hunting list.

Another possibility entered his mind: What if Faro had done it consciously? What if she had wanted to kiss Thrawn, her `friend´, on the mouth? Perhaps she thought it was alright? Like there was nothing to it? Perhaps Human `friends´ could even share a bed! Was she unintentionally tempting him? No. How could anybody _not_ think that such actions would evoke romantic if not erotic situations? No, if she wanted to preserve her innocence, she could kiss a poster of a holofilm star for all he cared, but not a living and sentient man. Not him. Thrawn wasn't sure how tell her all this, without ending their over-friendly relationship along the way. Because, despite appearances, he wanted to be kissed like that. And he wanted that those kisses meant the same to Karin as they did to him.

"Sir?" He heard Commander Hammerly’s disturbed voice nearby.

How long had he been `meditating´ like that, staring at the cosmic space in front of them? Fortunately, his crew was accustomed to his unusual behaviour, and when the Grand Admiral thought deeply about a problem, his officers tried not to disturb him, unless it was absolutely necessary.

He looked at Hammerly and, naturally, didn't tell her what had been on his mind, and she didn't dare ask him. Only Karyn was so bold. She was honestly interested in his thoughts and she was one of the few people capable of communicating with him on an equal footing...

An involuntary smile appeared on his face. Commander Hammerly probably thought he had solved some complicated problem or had figured out some brilliant strategy to get rid of the Rebels. That everything was alright and that she should not worry about his day-dreams - of Commodore Faro! At least nobody knew he was thinking about Karyn, instead of the Rebels. Fortunately, that included her as well.

"Please continue." He said calmly, and then got up, turned on his heel and left the bridge with dignified steps.

He felt the looks of his officers and their shared relief. He knew - and they knew it too - that he didn't have to watch them. They knew how to do their job. Whenever he could, Thrawn avoided being on the bridge - he used his command only during battles and therefore this was also what his crew associated with his presence on the bridge. When he was sitting in the chair, they stared at their displayed as if they were expecting something terrible to happen at any moment. Like something was bound to jump out of hyperspace and attack them. Probably none of the officers, troopers or technicians ever got the idea that the Chiss might just feel like sitting there, watching them for a while.

Once again, his rank isolated him from the rest. It was the same in the mess hall or in the Officers' Lounge. Maybe not quite `the same´, because in the Lounge everyone had to be off duty and more often than not the alcohol was pouring in streams, which allowed them to escape from their daily worries and relax a little. And what happened in the Lounge remained in the Lounge, and on the Chimaera's bridge, in its corridors, in the turbolifts, or in his office. After all, he was a Great Admiral and the Commander of the Seventh Fleet.

Still. He needed... a friend. He needed Karyn. Someone to talk to, plain and simple, informally. But at the same time, he saw more in Faro than just a friend - he saw an attractive woman and at times he felt more like getting to know her beautiful body than her penetrating mind.

He was partly interested in it because it was new, unexplored territory. And partly because he was lonely. He knew how different he was to other soldiers, from humans. But Chiss were social people, just like Humans. He wanted to get close to someone. No, not to `someone´ - he wanted to get close to Karyn Faro. She was the one who aroused deeper emotions in him.

So, his decision had been made. He wanted to proceed to the next stage of his plan to `conquer Karyn´. And he had to act immediately so as not to give the field to Major Carvia. He should invite her on a date, reveal his intentions, and suggest a transition from `friend´ to `partner´. And if things worked as planned, the whole kissing problem would solve itself.

But he had been there before. How to invite Karyn somewhere? And where could they possibly go? They couldn't just both leave the Chimaera at the same time and go on a date. Maybe he could arrange something in his quarters? A dinner? With candlelight? And alcohol? Or better - without candlelight? And alcohol? And not in his quarters? It was terrible.

The Grand Admiral was unable to focus on his duties for the rests of the day. If the Rebels had attacked out of the blue... Thrawn would have asked Admiral Konstantine for assistance, hoping the idiot would somehow manage. The whole situation was worse than a hangover. It was a strange feeling. Thrawn touched his mouth. Why had she kissed him? He didn't understand it. And when he couldn't understand something, he was confused, lost. He needed to talk about it with someone. Anyone. The Commodore usually helped him, but this time, unfortunately, she was the source of his troubles.

Maybe he should just be straight forward? State his point of view, put forward his demands and start negotiations. That was the language of war. The language both of them understood. A language Thrawn was able to speak perfectly. That way, he and Commodore Faro would avoid ambiguity. He wouldn't have to wonder if candles were too much, or if they reflected his intentions just right, and Faro didn’t have to wonder whether a meeting in his private quarters was a date or a war meeting.

Their relationship - no ANY relationship with Humans! - was terribly, terribly complicated. Humans just were far too casual. No Chiss would ever have kissed another Chiss `in a friendly way,´ without thinking about the physical side of things - but with Humans everything worked and on top of this they usually boasted this `openness´. Although he usually tried to fit in, to be `flexible´, he had set himself clear boundaries once. Boundaries he had not wanted to cross. Until he had done just that, with Commodore Faro.

Which, of course, ultimately had proven to be a very bad idea. And now it had become a problem which he had to solve somehow. He felt something for Faro - and how could he not, after what they went through and all the time they had spent together? He did not believe in love at first sight, but he was willing to believe in love at first kiss. That was how nature worked after all - at least Chiss nature. When two matching partners came into contact with each other, one attracted the other, which ultimately led to... that. Butterflies in the stomach and pressure in the pants. The irrational need to have sexual intercourse, to prolong the species as some have said.

The worst thing about it was that it wasn't just a physiological need of his body. No. It was lust, directed at a particular person: Commodore Faro. At the same time Thrawn wanted to protect her - from himself, from Major Carvia and other men who might want her that way. Faro was important to him, she was his protégé. He saw her potential. He believed that, in the future, the Commodore could achieve great things. She didn't need a man for that. She was a strong, independent woman who many men could secretly desire, knowing they would never possess her. The kind of woman Thrawn had, to his misfortune, fallen in love with before. Yes, she reminded him of Ar'alani, and at the same time she was very different from the Chiss Admiral - and for that he loved her even more. She embodied something he couldn’t have or shouldn't have. That's why he wanted her.

***

He should let her go and say good-bye. As soon as possible. But instead he had blocked her last transfer. He had told himself that she deserved more than just running an Operations Unit. She could - she should! - get your own Fleet. He wanted what he thought was best for her - like interrupting her friendship with Major Carvia. He would be a better choice, he could offer her so much more...

The chrono finally showed the time he had been waiting for - Faro's duty, and he, as her superior officer, could summon her into his office. The Commodore could no longer avoid him or the talk. They had to talk - like adults, aware of their needs: carnal and emotional.

When Commodore Faro crossed the threshold of his office, Thrawn felt the pressure. All he had to do was look at her, and his heart started to beat faster. There she stood - his beautiful Commodore, personally trained by him. She wore light make-up on her face - nothing that violated military regulations, however - it highlighted her charming smile, and the glow in her shining eyes, which told him she was ready for any challenges ahead of her.

It made him dare say: "I need your opinion on something."

She looked into his eyes with curiosity. He then reduced their distance.

She reacted to it, albeit not in the way he would have wanted it. Some tension appeared in her, she became nervous. Under a layer of primer and powder, her cheeks turned pink, but her pupils didn't narrow when she looked into his eyes.

_Was she perhaps still under the influence of narcotics?_

But she didn't retreat, even though she obviously wanted to.

"There are things that are hard to put into words," Thrawn said. "So let me show you."

He leaned over and kissed her on the mouth. Gently, not to frighten her. He tried to give back the kiss he had received from her the previous night.

Her hand clenched on his shoulder, first instinctively, and then her hug became more secure, stronger, more significant. Painful.

"Excuse me, Sir." Karyn turned her head, interrupting the kiss.

She turned away. Her face was red now.

"I made a mistake," Faro said quietly. "I crossed the line and... it won't happen again."

She stared at the floor as if their shoes had suddenly turned into the most interesting things in his office.

Thrawn touched her face and then raised her chin, forcing her to look at him.

Then he saw something in her eyes that amazed and hurt him: fear. His fearless Karin was afraid of him. Or maybe she wasn't so much afraid of him as she was afraid of what had made her kiss him.

"It would be better if we stayed friends," she said, and it somehow embarrassed him.

There was regret in her voice, which became even more evident in her beautiful hazelnut eyes.

"We are friends," Thrawn reminded her, "who..."

He looked at her lips, which, in response to his words, stretched into a sad smile.

"The regulations, Sir," Faro replied, "prohibit intimate relations between superiors and subordinates. Sorry, for quoting regulations, but... sometimes you seem to forget."

"Do I?"

Thrawn lifted one of his eyebrows. No, he didn't forget. Anything. He remembered the wording of naval regulations quite well. He just chose to ignore some of them every now and then.

"So, was it an unregulated kiss then, Commodore?"

Faro swallowed.

"Yes. And... as for yesterday, I drank too much and... I don't think I have an excuse."

"That's all?"

He looked at her with disapproval.

"Tell me, do you often kiss people under the influence of alcohol for whom you have no romantic feelings?"

"No, Sir. But I.. tend to do stupid things."

She laughed nervously.

"Things that seem like a great idea at the time, but are in fact... something I shouldn't do."

"Ah. So you wanted to break the rules?"

"No. I wanted to kiss you. It was stupid, but I just wanted to try..."

"Do it again." Thrawn interrupted her.

She looked at him uncertainly.

"Try it." His voice held as much encouragement as threat. He was provoking her. Regulations vs. direct order. She had to make a choice.

"No." she replied.

And took a step back.

"Why?," he asked almost gently. "We have done it before."

She shook her head.

"No. Not like this. You know very well that it would be ... completely different now."

"No. It always meant the same."

Faro closed her mouth and sent him an imploring look as if begging him to be reasonable - to not dream of something that could not be.

"Is it just the rules, Karyn?" he asked her then. "If there were no rules, would you want it?"

She let her head sink.

Then a new thought came to him. He remembered the cut and texture of the black uniform of the Expansionary Defense Fleet ... She would look beautiful in it.

If only he could let her go. But he just couldn't.

The END


End file.
